I couldn’t see his true colors- or maybe, intentions.
Whenever he say he loves me, I always have an anxiety attack
because I love him too. But I don’t know how-
to say it, to someone as mythical as him.
I can look at pain and see nothing but beauty
I can tell he’s an idiot, meaning he’s my whole universe
wrapped up in his perfected body
laced with all the assurance and uncertainties
I’ll ever need.
But he is color blind and
have no idea what I mean.
Maybe he’s doing his best, to show me
that the world is more than the blackness of my hair or
the brownness of my eyes and
the pink garden on my cheeks or
the hotness in my blood and
the blueness of the sky.
Maybe, he wants to teach me, train my eyes
to look at beauty that I’m not aware of
That haven’t been introduced to me before
But my love is blind.
I couldn’t read his love no matter how many times
he sends it through my mailbox
I couldn’t see the reason why he will love
someone as shipwreck as me
But still I love him. Even when I don’t know
how to say it. I love you!
Even when I hear him say he loves me too, I still don’t know.
I want to know if we’re looking at the same purple sea
if he can look at my bruises and wait for me
to kiss it myself
I want to know, that though he is color blind and my love is blind-
we both could see
that there’s a frozen love in the fridge
waiting for us, it is us.
And sometimes I wonder, if
we should take it out, let it melt in love
at the risk of evaporation or
we should just keep it preserved, solid and emotionless
But, do we stop living just because
we know we’re going to die?
I know I won’t!
My question now is-
will you help me take us out of the frozen machine
melt and disappear into the thin air
until such time our love is so soft
it would be so impossible to-
even solidify the matter?